Meandering Moments & Messages (Mmm… lmao) is what my posts with my eclectic and random small snapshots of my life will be called.. I would love to do this weekly but it’s definitely not a guarantee hahaha
Here’s a look at my world the last couple weeks
Can you believe that I have been to worse places than this??… (BTW, I was allowed to bypass the long line outside due to being disabled. Thankful for my suffering in that moment 😂😂)Just want to run my hand over this, mix it together and just see the separations disappear Sage’s nose is just as unique as the rest of herI wish I could see clearlyThe reflection in her eye looks, to me, like there’s a sound echoing out of her pupil My little sister (as my mom says), Star ⭐️ I love her so freaking much, she’s 8 months old and very energetic.Poor frog, it’s been on a long and treacherous road..Outside my parents house, some pretty noises came from this pretty little oneConnecting A guardian on his truck
UPDATE
Last week, Liz and I took a trip to see my parents and stay with them in Northern Arizona.. I prefer to drive rather than fly BUT sitting up for the 6 hour drive really wipes me out pretty bad for at least 2 days and causes some pain and, of course, I don’t eat perfect and I push myself to try to more than I should when out there so I did have to rest a lot.
But I’m really hoping to record the medical gaslighting and involuntary commitment video this week. 🤞
A year ago, on April 24th 2024 (4/24/24 for us Americans) I stumbled upon Ren. Here’s a video of me and my sister talking about that and touching on what that has meant to us.
To elaborate more on my art and the inspiration I got from Ren- around 2016/7 I realized how (due to my body) uncomfortable it was for me to do art the traditional way, and drawing straight lines was out of the question so I got frustrated and stopped doing art altogether- about 6 months after I found Ren, I was talking to a fellow RENegade and they mentioned that they were hoping to get an IPad to do some art, well, for some reason that got me thinking, I just got a larger phone, what if I tried using a stylus and tried out some drawing apps? I knew I could hold up my phone easily while laying in bed so it might actually be an accessible way for me to draw.. and if Ren could write all those songs while feeling like he was on his deathbed, I owed it to myself to at least try to see what I could do.. I got a cheap stylus on Amazon and the next day, I tried to do a quick sketch and used my reference image to map out where to do my lines and zoomed in and out and sent the fast sketch to my sis and bff..
When Liz said something along the lines of “wait, did you draw that?!” I got a rush of excitement. And very quickly finished my first real piece of art in about 8 years.
It felt like a religious experience to realize I could actually create something and it not feel incredibly difficult or uncomfortable. I cried before even sending it or posting it… but when I did share it, the crying only intensified. I felt like I had never felt so seen in my life up until that point. A month later, the man himself saw and shared that piece of art on his Instagram stories and that helped thousands of people see my art and I can’t even describe that feeling..
I could never thank Ren enough for everything he has done to spark inspiration in me and so many others.
That spark of inspiration doesn’t just stop at art though, something else that he has help me and others with- is hope, is feeling like we can actually take back some control of our health, is the knowledge that we aren’t alone in our suffering. There’s so much, I could probably write for hours but I’m sure you get the idea.
It’s been an amazing year of art, inspiration and hope and I can’t wait to spend the rest of my life listening to Ren, however long that may be 😂
Sara Sidewinder 